What I Learned

     I miss not going to Philadelphia to teach the course.   The hours spent studying and preparing; the inter-subjective engagement on conference calls with my fellow teachers, seeing this revolutionary course come to light in cities all over the world.  And, of course, traveling back and forth from New York with my friend and fellow-student, Kevin, as we shared this adventure in consciousness together - him at the wheel of the Honda Odyssey, always challenging me to go further.  Most importantly, however, I miss the inquiry and interactions with the students.  Their interest, questions and their wanting to know more, had me grappling, with and at, the edges of my experience and what I know.  At times, it even seemed as if we were all on the edge of making the unknown known together.  
     What I learned through teaching is that information and understanding is necessary but not sufficient when you are practicing evolutionary enlightenment.  Rather, I learned that what is most important is being authentic, listening deeply to others, and responding from one's own experience.  Indeed, teaching interrupted the complacency that I had about how much I felt I knew, or any notion, that I had arrived at a certain place in my own development.  For, the more I felt that I was developing, the more I realized how much I didn't know and how far I had to go; In fact, I was always finding myself at my own beginning.
     Teaching was a humbling experience, one in which I began to trust the grooves of my own passion and more and more allowed my heart to guide me, renouncing my need to come up with the right things to say or parrot the words of my teacher when challenged.  Indeed, so many times I caught myself cognitively saying the right things; saying things that could even be intriguing or inspiring, but that lacked the weight of my own experience.  I learnt what Andrew Cohen means when he says that even a discussion of the most profound and subtle spiritual matters can often become just sophisticated conceptual entertainment. For, at times, I couldn't back my communications up, because I wasn't living those truths deeply enough.   And, living them is my authenticity; communicating and responding to others from the depths of my soul rather than speaking from the trappings of my mind.
     Finally, I am so very grateful to my teacher, Andrew Cohen and to Jeff Carreira, who designed this course, for giving me this priceless opportunity.  I'm also grateful to those in Philadelphia who came together to create the beginnings of this "evolutionary vortex;" especially the students, whose participation, interest and engagement with the course has me eagerly wondering "What's Next?"